Attachment living, and specifically attachment parenting, is as Rachel said sometimes easy and sometimes more difficult. I think that what it brings to your life is more valuable than I know how to express. It has brought me closer to my husband, and family, and the world (past, present, and future) than I ever could have imagined, but at the same time following the principals of attachment living makes me feel very disconnected from many of the people around me.
I sat alone (this doesn’t often happen) in the chiropractor’s office several days ago with nothing to do, so I picked up a copying of Parenting Magazine that was sitting on the table. I haven’t looked at a Parenting Magazine in years. As I flipped through it I was pretty disgusted by most of everything I saw. It was shocking. I often realize that my parenting and living philosophies are different from those around me but I guess I had forgotten how completely different they actually were. The magazine was full of encouragement for parents to not respond to their children’s needs for this and that reason and assured the parents that in the end this was really the best thing for the child. How sad. To me it seems like a lot of nonsense that will make life a little easier for the time being. I forgot that the life that the dominant culture is living is so different than mine. I knew there were differences between my friends’ and my own choices in things like diapering, co-sleeping, feeding, shopping, etc. but I it really hit me hard to realize how fundamentally different I was from many of my closest friends and family members and all the other people reading writing and reading Parenting Magazine.
It really saddens me to think about the closeness, understanding, love, affection, security, trust, friendship, oneness, etc. that people are missing out on with their children and families. It also saddens me to think that our culture is encouraging us not to be attached. I don’t suggest that you are either part of attachment living or you are something else that is evil. My own journey to attachment living has been gradual and often a slow work in progress. It is something that seems very natural, and like what my family most needs, but it has not always been the easiest choice to make. I continue to make choices that are in opposition to what I see attachment living to be, but I try to go on and make better choices next time. I think that my greatest challenge right now is that I often feel like my family is the only family on this path. That everyone around me is criticizing our choices, and that opposition surrounds us.
That is why I find this online community so valuable to my sanity! These women are a great resource for ideas as well as encouragement. Thanks guys! I think the reason that attachment living is so easy is because everyone in the world has something within them that resonates with these values. It can be so difficult because we are constantly surrounded by images, attitudes, and suggestions that tell us otherwise. I want to welcome everyone to our new blog, and I hope that the entries here can help all of us sort out our feelings and continue to grow “attached” to each other and the world we are living in.
Kelly
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