Good-Bye Girls I'm Going To Boston

For two days I've had Arlo Guthrie's twang in my head, reminding me that I want to write this post. I can't go to bed without telling you that I adore Arlo, sure, but I'm really in love with Pete Seeger.

My four-year-old recently learned how to take charge of the cd player. She has a cd by Woody and Arlo Guthrie, and her favorite song on it is "I'm Gonna Mail Myself to You". Arlo sounds like he fell into the bottom of a well, which makes his voice that much more chipmunk-y on this catchy tune. "This Land is Your Land" follows "I'm Gonna Mail Myself to You" and it is sung by Woody. He always gets cut off after the first verse or so, when my daughter realizes "This Land is Your Land" has nothing to do with sticking bubble gum in anybody's mouth.

I started thinking about Arlo, Alice's restuarant, box car jumping, Wilco and Billy Bragg, musical storytellers, activism through art, and Pete Seeger. About this time last year I checked out a cd from the library entitled A Child's Celebration of Folk Music. The whole album was enjoyable, but I was drawn to the sounds made by Pete Seeger. I searched my library's database to find that Mr. Seeger worked hard to entertain children and adults, and I put holds on several of his cds, all of them excellent.

Sometimes I think of the songs as a musical version of waldorf-inspired toys: simple, natural, well-made and open-ended. Enduring. They invite the listener to interact, imagine and explore. A man and his banjo, sometimes whistling or clapping his hands, always singing with inviting joy. If you like folk music, maybe even if you don't, you can't go wrong with Woody, Arlo or Pete, but my heart belongs to Mr. Seeger.

I'm Gonna Mail Myself to You
(written by Woody Guthrie, but sung by Arlo in my house)

I'm gonna wrap myself in paper
I'm gonna dot myself with glue
Stick some stamps on top of my head
I'm gonna mail myself to you

I'm gonna tie me up in a red string
I'm gonna tie a blue ribbon too
Climb up inside my mailbox
I'm gonna mail myself to you

When you find me in your mailbox
Cut the string and let me out
Wash the glue from off my fingers
Stick some bubblegum in my mouth

When you find me in your mailbox
Wash the glue from off my head
Fill me up with ice cream sodas
Tuck me into a nice warm bed.

I'm gonna wrap myself in paper
I'm gonna dot myself with glue
Stick some stamps on top of my head
I'm gonna mail myself to you

The Best of the Breast

To be absolutely honest, there have been times when I have felt stinging bitterness while reading statements such as, "Oh, I LOVE nursing my baby!!! I want to breastfeed forever!!" Red faced and shamed, I have thought, with my baby latched to my breast, "oh please let this end soon, oh please let this end soon. Deep breath. How much longer? Baby, why aren't you full yet?" That was during a postpartum phase when my certified nurse midwife was ready to write me a prescription for "something" because I had filled out a questionnaire with a few too many indicators for possible post partum depression. "I'm in pain," I exclaimed to her, "every time he eats I'm in pain. He's six weeks old, so he eats all the time!" At times with blood dripping from me, blood dripping from his mouth. The feeling akin to hundreds of nails shooting into my nipples and through my breast. Cringeing through moments that were supposed to be special.

With both of my children I have gone through nearly every problematic issue possibly related to breastfeeding. I won't catalogue them all here, I don't really want to dwell in that space right now. Right now I want to gloat and dance the dance of someone who has come through the other side and witnessed the beauty that all of those other lucky women have beheld. I want to revel in those moments of breastfeeding that have not hurt, and have brought joy to my children and myself.

I am grateful for every chance I have had to feed my child from my body. In all of my reading on the topic (obsessive and exhaustive, stimulated by those hyper-focused new mama hormones), oh the stories I found out there! The discouraging, sad stories of pain, frustration and so much worry. Our new mama job is to Keep The Baby Alive. Everything else can go to hell, but Keeping The Baby Alive. When you plan to keep the baby alive via breastfeeding, but breastfeeding is not the simple, beautiful joy that surely nature must have intended... betrayal, heartbreak, fear, shame, anger.... but wait, I said I was not going to go there!

Instead I'll go to Mt. Tabor, the extinct volcano near my house in SE Portland. I was there just today, with my daughter, my partner, and my baby. While my daughter and her father explored the hillside, my sixth-month-old was ready for a meal. I nestled my back into the V bottom of a douglas fir, exposed roots supporting my arms. Stretching my legs out in the green grass, I released the straps of the baby carrier and positioned my baby gently in my arms, at my breast, where he latched easily. It was probably 80 degrees, blue skies, a gentle breeze ruffling the branches of the maples and doug firs surrounding me. A couple walked by. One of the pair, a woman in her 50s, strong and healthy and smiling happily, but not intrusively, at me. I smiled back, the exchange between two women who know how precious it is to do what I was doing. Gentle encouragement. Looking down I saw my baby, eating contentedly. Looking up I saw sky, clouds and the life of the trees. Looking outward I saw the vista of my favorite city, my home, my view. It was one of those special moments seemingly designed to erase the pains of a few short months ago. A moment to remind me of other breastfeeding moments that were particularly poignant: in the California Redwoods (pictured above), soothing my daughter simply and easily through a few different plane flights, sitting on river rocks as a cold Cascade Mountain Range runoff bubbled by, and that time I fed my son at my breast again, after a day of formula and pumping so I could heal enough to cope through more newborn feedings.

If you have had a special breastfeeding moment (or moments) that you would like to share, please do!

Our First Challenge - 30 Days of Green Smoothie

It's not a slumber party without snacks, and when everyone at the slumber party is lactating the snacks need to be thirst-quenching, nourishing, healthy and easy. It doesn't get easier than throwing some ingredients into a blender and hitting a button, something I can do with a baby in my arms. To-Fu started talking about smoothies and several of us leapt on board, gulping back piles of pureed fruit, exchanging ideas and recipes, and pulling our families into our jones.

Then BeanyMama pointed us towards this green smoothie challenge. It's a challenge to drink a green smoothie daily for 30 days, preferably for breakfast, and see what difference it makes to our health. The site contains some recipes to get started with.

A few of us have started to dabble in green smoothies, but starting Tuesday we're going whole leaf and taking on the challenge en masse (sans one). Over the next 30 days we'll be checking in from time to time to share our smoothie experiences as we go green from the inside out. Our access to food varies, based upon climate, schedules, and funds, so we'll all have a different take on this challenge. Each week we'll have a Smoothie of the Week, with suggested ingredients for us to play with and report back on. This week our smoothie will be based loosely on the Peach and Spinach recipe from the linked site.


Any and all readers are welcome to join us. We would love to hear about your experiences as well. Let's drink our veggies together!

Rachel

Well, Hello There

Can I start? I can't bear the thought of a blog just sitting there, unposted, unread. There is a whole group of Baby Ladies with wonderful things to say about everything, and here we have a great place to share our ideas with others.

Last night, in between nursing my teething five-month-old, comforting my stuffed up four-year-old and pumping some milk for my final days of working before summer vacation, my head was buzzing with all sorts of ideas about attachment parenting and attachment living. In a recent conversation, one of the Baby Ladies put it best when she described her feelings about crying it out: "I see it as disconnected with your life, with your child. Not being present, not caring, not even caring to know what you are missing. Not thinking, not thinking for yourself, not listening to your heart." Crying it out or CIO is athe practice of letting a baby cry, uncomforted, in the name of training them to comfort themselves to sleep.

Attachment parenting and attachment living is the opposite of that. It is being connected with life, your child, where you live, where your fellow human beings live, and where your decendents will live. It is following your heart and your intuition to create and maintain those connections for more than fleeting moments. It is not a disposable lifestyle.

For some, disposable equates with enjoyable and easy. Truthfully, with some practice, attachment living is more enjoyable. Sometimes it's easier, sometimes not, but always worth it.

Rachel